I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
