big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize