haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
