I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
