Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Randomize
