the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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