There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize