this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Randomize
