You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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