Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
