What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
