the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I feel like death gave me a hand job
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
