Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Randomize
