Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
She told me I should be a condom model.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I just had sex on a roof
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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