All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
