Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I'm like, not good at living.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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