Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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