ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize