woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
