I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
