Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
