You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
