If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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