You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
