His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
you made out with another girl for some wings
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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