I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
