Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
