You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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