We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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