4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
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