We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
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