wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
