oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Randomize