Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I just found a bag of teeth...
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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