I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
