jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Sponge bath it is.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
