Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
