i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
