just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
