He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Randomize
