I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
