I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
