i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
there's paper in my vomit.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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