my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
The ass gains better be worth it
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