you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Randomize
