She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
