so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
