My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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