In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
