i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
