Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
