Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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